Mid-twentys Life


I am now 25 years old and over-hearing my mom talk about me over the phone made me realize a lot of things. In other words, it struck me. I think I could say that I am in a situation that I don't really want. I want to analyze the situation and know what steps do I need to do. Lets break it down.

I am 25 years old, I graduated from college 2010 with a BS Computer Engineering degree. I had corporate work experience for 1 year with Smart Communications and now 1 year with More Than Winning Sports Consultancy or MTW Sports (a small corporation set up by my mentor). I am still single, but courting somebody (will share in another entry). I am currently given the General Manager role for MTW Sports which means I need to keep it alive and running. I am very passionate in serving God that I originally planned of leaving Smart to study in a Bible school but because of lack of financial support I needed to help full time in MTW Sports.

Okay so here I am going through these motions. I am feeling fear, lack of confidence, irritated, disappointment, a little regret and was given false hope. It kinda sucks but like what I say in my mind I must act "like a boss" and not show these emotions. I like the idea of having a strong image but reality will hit me that I am just not who I want myself to be.

I dreamt of having a 6-figure monthly income, a nice car, secured future. To sum it up, I dreamt of a comfortable life at the age of 25. What went wrong? I believe there were turns in life that I could have had taken to change my current situation. But do I really want that?

Despite these disappointments in life, I am eternally secured. I have a sovereign God. Romans 8:28 says "And we know that for those who love God ALL things work together for good for those who are called according to his purpose." God is in control and I need to have more faith in Him and trust Him. Its hard to think of these especially having these feelings but truths, Biblical absolute truths, must prevail over emotions. 

"Father, I know that I am nothing, I am only a person under your grace and have nothing to boast. I know that you are in control of all things and has a purpose for the things happening around me. If these are your will to teach me about pride and make me humble, so be it. I'd like to be a person with nothing yet pleases You that a wealthy man running away from You. I pray that you transform the way I see things and trust in the all-knowing, all-powerful God. Father, break me, make me and use me. Kayo nang bahala kung saan and kung papaano mo ako gagamitin. I pray these things in the mighty name of Jesus, Amen."

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